“If you have someone that you think is The One,
don’t just sort of think in your ordinary mind,
‘OK, let’s pick a date. Let’s make a party, and get married.’
Take that person and travel around the world.
Buy a plane ticket for the two of you to travel all around the world,
and go places that are hard to go to and hard to get out of.
And if when you come back to JFK, when you land in JFK,
and you’re still in love with that person,
get married at the airport.”
Wisdom comes in all shapes and sizes, and sometimes from unexpected sources. A couple of days ago a spike in views reminded us of one of our previous posts which proved this point exactly. After all these years it’s still one of our favorites posts, and we agree wholeheartedly with Murray’s idea.
So have another look at Bill Murray’s sage advice on travel as a relationship test.
* * *
With a couple of failed marriages under his belt, Bill Murray might not be the best source for matrimonial advice, but in this case he may be onto something.
Travel is exciting, educational, and a cultural smorgasbord. It’s a rewarding endeavor, but when things go sideways, it can also be incredibly stressful. Travel, by definition, takes you out of your comfort zone, and stress has a way of reducing things to their essence. For relationships, it’s a crucible.
Like most long-term travelers, we’ve had our share of unpleasant travel surprises and scrapes: military coups, taxi rip-offs, cheesy hotels, border shakedowns, rancid food, and the icing on the cake – dengue fever … twice. And we weathered all these travel storms together.
Terri and I have always been extremely close, but our years of travel have only tightened the bond between us. I’m sure that our readers who travel as couples will agree … it can make or break a relationship.
In 2018, the average cost of a wedding in the US was over $30,000! Weddings, whether extravagant or economical, are the ultimate personal choice, and I’m not advocating getting married on the cheap. What I am saying is that if you truly want to get to know your partner before the vows are spoken, take some of the money that you’re planning to spend on a fancy wedding and travel together. Partners on the road must be supportive, flexible, open-minded, and most of all, true friends; in a word – simpatico. And I’m sure that the Ghostbuster would agree there’s no better way to start a marriage.
The Bill Murray Backstory
For those that don’t know – and why would you – Bill Murray lives in Mt. Pleasant, South Carolina; just across the Cooper River from where we lived in Charleston. I have no idea how or why he ended up in Mt. Pleasant, but he’s living about as far off the Hollywood grid as possible. He’s notorious for popping up around town in bars and restaurants, as he did recently in a Charleston steakhouse where a bachelor party was in progress. Someone asked if he’d like to have a drink and make a few comments, and the opening quote was his advice to the rowdy crowd.
There’s no denying that he’s a cool guy, and from all the stories, very approachable. He’s a generational Bud, and the Dalai Lama is on his side, so he’s got that goin’ for him. If you’re a Murray fan like me, there’s a website specifically for stories about his encounters with fans. Great stuff – check it out.
James & Terri
This post is part of our “Lessons From The Road Series.” Click here to see all the posts in the series. And if you’re curious, here are 10 Things We Learned From a Year of Travel … and why sometimes the lesson is that you just have to break a few rules.
1. Paul Sherwood via Wikimedia Commons
2. Minette via Wikimedia Commons
3. Ícaro Moreno Ramos via Wikimedia Commons<